MomME Time is an IG live series that was birthed during the pandemic. One season,16 episodes featuring some of my friends who are parents from the entertainment industry and key influencers you wanted to hear from.
The year was 2020. I was going through a rough time. Covid aside, I was secretly glad that everyone was stuck at home. Because it meant that everyone was available to share the load and responsibilities of parenthood. Mila, my second born, was about 5 months old then.
What started out as a feeling of relief slowly turned into major blues. Till this day, I’m not entirely sure if it was due to postpartum hormones or just the idea of being confined in our home, doing the same thing every single day without an end in sight.
Either way, I was a wreck. If you ask my punching bag aka my husband, Jon, he would tell you that I was a mess. One day, I’d be feeling hopeful, grateful that I was able to work out and the next moment, I was clouded and overwhelmed with negative thoughts and emotions. I even said it out loud a few times that I wanted to hurt myself or end my life. When the surge of negativity came, I felt a sense of irrationality, unable to control my thoughts or listen to a word Jon was saying. I deflected everything that came out of his mouth and convinced myself that he had no idea what I was going through or how I was feeling. Perhaps it was the hormones talking because every morning, it was as though I hit the refresh button. I was fine.
I explored various ways to cope with my anxiety or whatever feeling that was. From meditation, breathing exercises, listening to podcasts, physical exercises and thankfully, they helped. I tried my best to focus on the little things that would bring me joy and excused myself or asked for help whenever I was feeling overwhelmed. That was a major breakthrough for me because when I had Miles, my firstborn, I was very reluctant to ask for help because I wouldn’t allow myself to feel defeated. I wanted to be the mom who knew my child best and capable of doing it all for him. And this is something I would really like to stress upon. Not just for myself but anyone who needs to hear this. It is okay to ask for help. It does not make you less of anything.
It was also in those moments that I thought to myself, I can’t be the only person feeling this way. And that’s how the idea of MomME Time came about. I wanted to reach out and connect to other parents. I wanted to create conversations so that those who may be going through similar experiences don’t have to feel alone. I am a firm believer that humans are not meant to be alone. No man is an island, when you go together, you go further and all that jazz. We’re meant to form connections.
If you know me, I am a planner and somewhat a perfectionist. Which is why a lot of times, I’ve all these ideas in my head but they never get executed. I’m still working on that. But yes, for the first time in my life, I did something without overthinking it. So I guess this whole postpartum blues journey has been a blessing in disguise. I reached out to some people, put stuff together and boom, in less than 2 weeks, MomME Time went live. I am so grateful for the people who jumped on board. You know who you are and you have no idea how much this series means to me.
I told myself that no matter what I do in life, I want to do it with sincerity. I want to show up wholeheartedly. MomME Time was my way of showing up for myself and talking about it was my way of letting go and moving forward. And though it seems scary, shouting out your issues or problems to the world may just help you find the solution that you need. It is never the end of the road.
Check out full episodes of MomME Time here